Lots of anxiety this morning about the approaching unknowns

I've been enjoying a somewhat break from the cyclical anxiety that I go through, most likely because work stress has almost been absent from my life for the past few weeks.

I woke up this morning to the exception; an intense feeling of dread and thoughts racing in my head, again mostly centered around what I expect (or not knowing what to expect) upon my return to work after FMLA. I couldn't get out of bed for about an hour which is unusual for me; (That hasn't happened for a very very long time).

I have an "as needed" prescription I could take but it tends to make me drowsy later in the day and I feel like there's just too much to get done, which is also fueling the growing sense of panic. Instead I am employing my strategy of doing the things I can control, chores, self care, (and blogging) to achieve little victories that make me feel better. With each baby step while the morning progresses, The anxiety and breathless feeling gets a little better.

Her doctor removed the 50% weight restriction from her new hip, and so we have basically 5 days to graduate my wife from the use of a 4 legged walker to using a simple cane for ambulation, so she can be alone while I am at work but still able to carry food or or drinks and other necessities while safely getting around the house. I am worried that this isn't enough time for her to acclimate.

And on top of all that I fear what I may do if things go sideways at work. Allie is the strong one these days, and she may assert herself to the point of outing me to management, with the anticipated result of no longer having to deal with the conundrum anymore due to unemployment.

If you are reading this and have any helpful ideas or constructive advice please comment; or of you happen to have my PM info you may do that too. Im open to anything that might help me prepare.

Thanks :)